I’d like to tell you a story. It’s a story of surprising contrasts. This month, I attended two different networking events, and the average age of the attendees at the two events was very different. The first event was a member orientation for a national women’s volunteer organization; the attendees were professional women and the average age range was early 20s through mid 30s. In other words, young professional women.

The other was an educational conference for my fellow image consultants. Most of us were in our 40s, 50s, and 60s. In other words, “mature” professional women.

What do you think the younger group were wearing? If I had to describe the prevailing outfit, I would have to say it was jeans and/or something black. I was surprised at the lack of color in the younger group’s clothes. Were they thinking they needed to tone it way down because they were at a business function? These young women played it so safe when in truth, it wasn’t necessary. For the record, I was wearing a dress with a brown and turquoise print, brown boots, and a teal blue coat. And I am turning 50 this month.

Now, what do you think the image consultants were wearing? Naturally, every single one of us was dressed beautifully in age- and business-appropriate clothes. But the color! Shades or orange paired with grey; reds of every imaginable variation of warm to cool; exhuberant prints in teal and purple; gorgeous outfits in neutral camels with beiges and browns. Yes, there was black. But always paired with a gorgeous color or vibrant print. At one point I counted at least a dozen out of the 35 or so of us wearing some version of an animal print.

I found this contrast fascinating, and a little depressing. What have these young women heard up to this point that has them convinced that the only way to be taken seriously is to eschew color at a business function? When did these young women learn it wasn’t acceptable to express your own personal style, even at a business function? With so many color choices these days, and with the ability of anyone to find out what their best colors are via a custom color analysis, why would a young woman choose no color at all?

Who doesn’t love a good top 10 list? This one’s tough to contain in a list of ten, because with all the choices we ladies have these days, so much can go wrong.

1. Clothing that does not fit properly
This is the most important one on the list and if you ignore the other nine, pay attention to this one. Here’s the deal: you can pay $300 for a pair of pants, but if they do not fit you properly, your money was wasted. On the other hand, you can buy a dress at Target for $29.99 and the fit is right, you can look like a million dollars.
Women come in so many shapes and sizes, but nearly all of us fall into one of three vertical body styles and one of six horizontal body styles. Your vertical and horizontal body measurements determine your horizontal and vertical body style, which in turn dictates the shapes and silhouettes of clothing that will look best on you. If you aren’t sure, consider having a body style analysis.

2. Wearing colors that are not in harmony with your natural coloring
For many women, color is intimidating. We have all seen someone wearing a color that makes her look washed out or sallow, or just doesn’t look right. The reason for this is that most people do not wear colors that are in harmony with their natural body coloring. The colors in your eyes, hair and skin comprise your body coloring, and colors that harmonize with these colors will always look good on you. There is a reason redheads look so great in certain greens, and women with dark features look good in rich jewel tones. If you aren’t sure, consider having a custom color analysis.

3. Wearing the wrong bra size
It’s true: most women are wearing the wrong bra size. Getting measured by an experienced professional will give you the most accurate results, but you can try it yourself. Measure the circumference of your rib cage just under your bust, then measure the circumference around your bust at the fullest part. Subtract the rib cage, or band, measurement from the bust measurement. This number will determine your cup size, one inch for A, two for B, etc. For example, if your band measurement is 33 and your bust measurement is 36, your bra size is 36C.

4. Showing too much skin
Does this one really need an explanation? If you need one, send me an email and I will elaborate.

5. Not wearing makeup
Wearing no makeup is not a solution if your image is important to you, since recent studies show people in the workplace respond more positively to a woman who is wearing a tasteful amount of makeup vs. none at all. 

6. Worn or dirty shoes
Shoes are the anchors of an outfit, and just because they’re down by the ground doesn’t mean people don’t notice them. I recently saw a lady who had dressed up so nicely for church, and as my eye traveled from her hat to her dress to her shoes, I was shocked to see they were badly in need of repair. This woman had taken so much care in dressing herself, but her unkempt shoes were the thing I remember most. Your shoes are an investment; take care of them and give them regular maintenance such as polishing and heel replacement.

7. Bad pant hems
For a more polished image, get your pants hemmed so they don’t drag on the ground or get caught between the heel of your foot and the back of your shoe. Hem them so that they fall at the point where the bottom of the sole meets the top of the heel.

8. Bad/dated hair style or color
Your hair style should always complement your face shape, and we always look best when we stay with the colors nature gave us. There is nothing wrong with a little enhancement, but many women, when they start to go grey or when they desire a change, make the mistake of going too light or too bright with their hair color. Stay in the range that you had in your youth. If you aren’t sure, book an appointment for a color analysis, which includes a hair color consultation.

9. Jumping on the trend bandwagon
It might have been fun when we were in our 20s, but nothing says desperate more loudly than a mature woman who is a fashion victim. Taste and restraint will always win the day, so stick with the classics. And I don’t mean dowdy or dull. You can have a stylish, contemporary wardrobe without being a trend monster or a frump.

10. Lack of a wardrobe plan
If you feel as though you have a closet full of clothes but nothing to wear, you don’t have a wardrobe plan. If you don’t have a clothing budget, you should, and it should be part of your wardrobe plan. A wardrobe plan will mean you will always find dressing easy and fast. A wardrobe plan is the only way you can achieve a closet full of clothes and outfits that fit you great, are in your best colors, and show you in your best light at all times.

Pants are a challenge for me, but one of my New Year’s resolutions is to become more open to pants. Especially since there are so many great pant styles out there and I see so many women looking great in them. It’s a matter of honing in on the pant styles that flatter my body style best and are also the most comfortable.

If you aren’t sure what your body style is, consider investing in a body style analysis. But for now, here is some general wisdom regarding how to choose the best pant for you.

Start with fabric. You will have the most success when you invest in pants made from higher quality fabrics. They drape on your body better, and quality fabrics always feel best on your skin. Not to mention the fact that they last longer and wear better.

Waist. To ensure a proper fit in the waist, you want to be able to pinch 1 to 1 ½ inches of fabric at the hip line. The waist line should not sag or pull down in front or back.

Crotch and seat. There should be no pulling or bagging at the crotch or seat areas, either.

Pleats. These are mostly a matter of personal preference however, flat front pants have a more slimming effect. They also look more sleek and modern. If you do choose pants with pleats, the pleats should lie closed, or flat.

Pant length. In general, the hem of the pant should fall where the shoe upper meets the heel.

Pant width. The longer the pant length, the wider the hem should be. And therefore, the shorter the pant length, the narrower the hem should be. These guidelines will produce the most pleasing proportions on most women.

What about cropped pants? These styles can be fun to wear, but remember the rule about length vs. width. Also, shorter women will look their best if they wear a heel when wearing cropped pants.

Cuffs. A pant with a cuff will always make the leg look shorter than a pant without a cuff. Women under 5’5” should avoid cuffs on their pants.

Color and texture. If you are larger on the bottom half of your body, you want to opt for darker colored pants as well as fabrics with little or no texture or shine. If you are slimmer throughout the hips, seat and thighs, you can wear lighter colored pants as well as some texture and shine, such as satin.

Shoes. A heel will dress up any pair of pants, including jeans, chinos, and capris.

Alterations. It is rare to purchase a pair of pants that fit you perfectly everywhere on your body; most of the time, some type of alteration will be necessary to ensure the best fit. Always factor in the cost of alterations when purchasing pants.

Sometimes my clients will give a gift of my services to a friend, family member or coworker. That is one of the highest compliments I can receive as an image consultant. For someone to value my services enough and trust me enough to recommend their loved one or colleague is a huge affirmation.

The tricky part is, not everyone is ready for an image consultant. So much of what I do can delve into some very sensitive areas of self-esteem and body image and I often feel like part of what I offer is therapy. I have to be very sensitive to these feelings of my clients. I have to listen well and be very diplomatic with my observations, comments and recommendations.

But I also owe it to my clients to give them my honest, professional feedback in order to help them craft their ideal image. When someone comes to me on their own, he or she has done some of the work already. They have recognized and acknowledged their need for my services, and they are open to hearing what I have to say.

When someone is sent to me, they often come to me wondering why. They wonder if they should be flattered or insulted that someone has sent them to an image consultant, so sometimes they arrive on the defensive. I do all I can to gently guide them through the process, but at the end of the day, a lot of what I have to say is a shock to the system if one is not mentally prepared and open to the process.

I would suggest that when you give someone a gift of my services, talk to them about it, describing what your experience was working with me and how you benefited. Start off with a compliment. Perhaps say something about what you admire about their personal style, or mention a physical feature of theirs that you like. Do they have beautiful eyes? Mention that you learned how when we wear the colors in our eyes we look especially attractive. Are they blessed with a curvaceous figure? Talk about how dressing your own figure has been a challenge, and that by working with an image consultant you have been able to find what works best for your particular shape.

And if you are on the receiving end, come with an open mind, and be flattered and grateful that the gift giver cares enough about you to want you to look your best, and to therefore achieve your goals.

He's back.

I love the idea of forgiveness. The practice is another matter, of course, but for me, forgiveness leads to liberation. When I reach the point of being able to forgive someone, I feel a burden being lifted off me.

As a practicing Catholic, I hear about forgiveness all the time. Besides love, it’s the number one thing many of us associate with Jesus and therefore, with God. God wants to forgive us, and he wants us to forgive each other. All the time. And it isn’t easy.

John Galliano has been one of my favorite designers ever since he took over the post of designer at Givenchy and then Christian Dior in the mid 1990s. I consider him an absolute genius. So naturally, I was very sad when I witnessed his meltdown last year, captured on video by some patrons in a restaurant in Paris in which he had let himself become very drunk. He acted like an ass and said some extremely ugly things; it was painful and embarrassing to watch.

He later apologized for his behavior, was punished with a fine, and ultimately fired from Dior. Whether or not one agrees with the decision to fire him, it was odd for most of us Americans to see someone pulled into court and fined money for saying something stupid and offensive because of the way free speech is treated in our culture.

I remember seeing this photograph of Galliano in Vogue magazine a few months later. He was with his friend Kate Moss, she was in her Galliano-designed wedding dress, and he was fixing her train. They both looked very happy. I remember that I mentally wished him well and hoped he was going to move past this episode and continue to create great fashion. I know lots of people will get indignant and think it’s terrible for me to have these sorts of feelings toward a man who actually spoke the words “I love Hitler.” But come on. I’m laughing to myself as I’m typing this. Does anyone actually believe John Galliano loves Hitler?

Galliano has launched a new e-commerce site and continues to design beautiful clothes under his eponymous label. I am hopeful that he will continue to do what he was put here to do: create beauty in our world. Let’s practice what we preach, and forgive him.